I have a lot of ideas for posts that I want to do. But this one, I’ve wanted to write for some time. Shannon @GoingWithHappy made a blog post, Social Media Detoxing, and it helped remind me of this topic.
Before the idea of creating a blog entered my mind, I had stopped posting as much on my personal social media. My level of interest in it had become very low. I deleted Snapchat off my phone and closed my personal Twitter account. And I had stopped using Facebook in high school. So in the process of elimination Instagram was my only social media, but I even got tired of that.
By tired, I’m not talking about Instagram as an application but the persona that I had created. When I made my account, I had just graduated high school, and I was healthy. On Instagram, I would always see perfect food, hair, makeup, and places to travel to. I thought that I needed to contribute to this.
At the time, I didn’t realize that I was just adding on to the illusion of social media. Because it wasn’t until around the year 2014, that my health started to change. I got sicker and my mobility was different. I no longer had opportunities to feature and showcase what I used to on my Instagram. Instead of being out in the middle of a field, my view was now a doctor’s office. And even though, I’ve tried there’s no way to get a pretty picture of that.
It got to the point that I would hide that part of me, the sick side. I would post the “best” or “pretty” parts of my life and hide the ugly. But I wasn’t acknowledging that the “best” or “pretty” parts were coming around less and less. One day, I woke up and I realized that my whole life had changed. I needed to be honest with myself.
Around this time, Lara Parker at BuzzFeed published, I Stopped Lying About How Happy I Was On Instagram And Started Telling The Truth About Chronic Pain, I ask that everyone go read this if you already haven’t. Reading this article helped me break out of this false reality that I had built for myself. For one, I was treating my illnesses as a thing or a problem and not as a part of me. Two, I thought by not letting people in, the problems would go away.
So I started to post more on Instagram, but I went about it differently. This time around, I decided to be honest about whatever I’m going through. There are days that I don’t feel like or can’t get out of the bed depending on if it’s physical or mental. There’s only so much of a story, a picture can tell, so this is also one of the reasons I started my blog. I wanted to share my journey and tell my story.
Social media has grown so much in such a short amount of time. It’s used to connect people, reach out, and make friends. But it can also influence. The influence it has on some can leave a powerful effect. I think we all can use the occasional reminder that it’s just an illusion.